Eulogy for the Green Church

By Matthew Lysiak
The Brooklyn Paper

The Green Church will not be saved — you can take that to the bank and cash it. Yet despite the writing on the check, some members of the community continue to fight the inevitable.

Call it denial (or call it optimism), but many residents are having a hard time coming to terms with losing their beloved church, which according to a spokeswoman for the Massey Knakal realty giant, is as good as sold.

“The property is under hard contract,” said Keri Neering.

So Bay Ridge United Methodist, the 107-year-old structure on Fourth and Ovington avenues, will be torn down and it will become condos — but don’t blame a lack of effort from local preservationists. They have worked hard, and against long odds, to maintain the integrity of our neighborhood, prompting the consensus cliché — the Hail Mary.

The first “Hail Mary” attempt was by Councilman Vince Gentile (D–Bay Ridge), who worked out a deal that would have saved the church, added condo units to the neighborhood, and yielded a $300,000 annual windfall for the church for upkeep.

Most viewed Gentile’s pass as a perfect spiral, except for the congregants of the church, who wanted no savior (at least in terms of saving the structure).

The second Hail Mary attempt (remember you get four downs) was thrown by the Committee to Save the Bay Ridge United Methodist Church. They urged people to call the Landmarks Preservation Commission, which has the power to declare a building a landmark even without the owner’s permission. But that pass never even made it back to the line of scrimmage: Landmarks promptly declined the request to protect the 100-year-old church.

Then, historian Wade Goria raised the roof at last month’s Community Board 10 meeting in yet another attempt to save the church. Goria, whose microphone was pulled out of his hand at the previous meeting by CB10 Chairman Dean Rasanya after he bashed the Methodist hierarchy, began an impassioned sermon of his own, ranting and screaming (at times, quite eloquently) at the standing-room-only audience.

“We can not let them take this from us,” Goria shouted. “This is our community, this is our church, and this is our fight, now is the time to make our voices heard.”

Yellow Hooker is thinking a new cliché might be more appropriate. This one involves an obese woman and the final few notes of a song. Well, they gave it a shot (or two, or three).

The Kitchen Sink
Everything Zen? Not at least as far as the garbage and debris at Shore Road Park is concerned. The trash is located between two of the park’s most-cherished attractions: the Zen Garden and the Butterfly Park. Before we can cleanse the doors of perception, perhaps officials should first cleanse the large cement stones and the old fencing. …

War, what is it good for? How about the best shawarma with garlic sauce? Bay Ridge Neighbors for Peace is now meeting on Mondays at Mazza Plaza, which is at 8002 Fifth Ave., at 8 pm. …

A source tells The Stoop that state Sen. Marty Golden (R–Bay Ridge) is closer to running for Mayor. “Let me put it this way, at this point we feel quite encouraged,” said the source.

Ridge inventor milks it

By Matthew Lysiak
The Brooklyn Paper

A Bay Ridge inventor is ready to go national with her innovative breast-feeding blouse — and she’s bringing her four children with her.

Mother is truly the mother of this invention, and entrepreneur Missy Reder owes her success to her four small children’s healthy appetites.

“I have always felt proud to be able to nurse my baby,” said Reder. “I never want to hide my baby under a blanket.”

Reder might never have invented her now-celebrated “Slurp and Burp” had she been able to find anything remotely helpful on the market when she had her fourth child last year.

So, she then did what all good inventors do; she took matters into her own hands.

“I was feeding the baby at 2 am when all of a sudden it came to me,” Reder said. “The whole design, everything, it all just came to me at once.”

Her invention is a sash that is worn over one shoulder and under the mother’s opposite arm, with an additional loop of layered cotton material — it’s patented, by the way! — that conceals the entire breast. The design allows the mother to be covered and the baby to be uncovered.

The rest, as they say, is “Slurp & Burp” (her husband gets credit for the name) history.

One mom who watched the invention in action thought it was brilliant.

“This idea is genius,” said Helen Vershavsky. “I wish they had these when I was nursing.”

Now Reder’s invention is the talk of baby land (or, at least, Babytalk Magazine, which will feature the invention in an August article that will call it a “must have” for moms who travel with an infant).

Reder isn’t the normal inventor; her trade by day is as a speech therapist and she is a regular at local yoga classes (not to mention raising four hungry children).

“I want to encourage other women to go ahead and follow their dreams,” said Reder. “We are all exhausted, but if there is something you want to pursue, don’t let a few dark circles stand in your way.”

Goldwater’s out of Mike Long’s party

By Matthew Lysiak
The Brooklyn Paper

The marriage was doomed from the start. But file the divorce papers, anyway: the Conservative Party has disavowed one of its founding fathers.

Last Tuesday, the party of limited government argued that marriage should consist only of the union of one man and one woman (little surprise there). What few realize is that this idea is a thumb in the eye of the man responsible for the existence of the New York State Conservative Party — Barry Goldwater. The issue is over the limits of government.

On one side we have Brooklyn Conservative Party Vice-Chairwoman Fran Vella-Marrone, who was quick to oppose Gov. Spitzer’s effort to permit gay marriage.

“The Conservative Party has been the loudest voice in this state defending traditional family values,” said Vella-Marrone.

On the other side is a ghost from the past. The founding father of the movement — Goldwater — was not only pro-Choice, but didn’t think the government should have anything to do with marriage. Goldwater may be dead — but his memory is alive and well in Bay Ridge. To this day, state Conservative Party Chairman Mi­chael Long recalls how, as a young man, Goldwater put a spell on him at the 1964 Republican National Convention at Mad­ison Square Garden.

“Barry Goldwater was the reason I got into politics,” said Long, who still has a Goldwater poster hanging at his liquor shop, Long’s Discount Wines, at 7917 Fifth Ave.

“You wouldn’t believe the feeling of hope in the air that night, that we could get this country on track and Goldwater would be the one to lead us,” Long said.

The philosophy? “Government ought to be kept off our backs, out of our pocketbooks, and out of our bedrooms,” Goldwater said.

That didn’t sit well with the religious right, which wanted the Republican Party to embrace restrictions on gay rights and abortion. Yet Goldwater insisted that conservatism meant limited government — whether on fiscal or social issues.

But that ideal is nowhere to be found on today’s political landscape.

Long may still have that campaign poster, but he has cut ties with his Goldwater past: “Some conservatives are for abortion,” he said, “but we are a pro-life party.”

Yellow Hooker has a pretty good idea of what Long’s mentor might say if he were alive to witness the changing times: “Extremism in the defense of liberty is no vice and moderation in the pursuit of justice is no virtue.”

The Kitchen Sink
State Sen. Marty Golden (R–Bay Ridge) may be angling for an unlikely voter block in his possible run for mayor — the underappreciated skateboarder. Golden recently announced funds to put Parks employees at the Owls Head Skate Park at 68th Street and Colonial Road. …

Councilman Vince Gentile (D–Bay Ridge) is encouraging public participation in a “free walking program,” every Saturday from 10 to 11 am. Call (718) 965-6977. …

Moms are lighting up the Bay Ridge Parent message boards about playground bullies who have been kicking kids off the swings at the playground at 83rd Street and Colonial Road. See, kids! That’s one more reason to eat your leafy green vegetables.

Preacher brings hands to Ridge to perform ‘miracles’

By Matthew Lysiak
The Brooklyn Paper

Hallelujah and praise the Lord! A new preacher is coming to town — and he is making some big promises.

Pastor Michael Casale says he’ll start doling out “miracles and prophecies” when his new church opens this week in Bay Ridge.

“Bring the sick and receive your miracle,” said Casale, who will oversee the Cavalry Praise and Worship Center, a new non-denominational church at 367 94th St. “Come and receive your touch from the Lord.”

Casale certainly talks the talk.

“We do miracles, prophecies — more than your average church,” he told The Stoop. “We have performed many miracles in the name of Jesus Christ, and we don’t plan on stopping anytime soon.”

Casale claims to also perform a “laying of the hands,” an act where parishioners are touched in the forehead and often collapse to ground or faint from the power of God.

“I know it is real because it happened to me when I was 13 years old,” said Casale, who claimed to be licensed by the “Summary of God,” an independent ordination group. “It is a great feeling, but hard to describe. Kind of like electricity all through your body.”

Still, some local residents are skeptical of the self-professed supernatural powers of the new preacher man of Bay Ridge.

“Is this a joke?” asked Megan Desanto. “Are we in the Bible Belt? I am not buying any of this crap.”

Why Bay Ridge? True, the pastor’s day job is as a court liaison for the 68th Precinct in the neighborhood — but he says he didn’t choose Bay Ridge, but that Bay Ridge chose him.

“I felt called to Bay Ridge,” he said. “But there were never any openings until now.”

One woman said she might attend the first service on June 3. She also said that even though her mind was open, her wallet was closed.

“It couldn’t hurt to go and check it out,” said the woman, who declined to give her name. “But you can be certain that I am not going to let my wallet out of sight for even one moment.”

Boo-liani in Bay Ridge; Protestors rally against Rudy

By Matthew Lysiak
The Brooklyn Paper

Republican frontrunner Rudy Giuliani got a hero’s welcome inside a Bay Ridge catering hall this week — but outside, the man running for president as “America’s Mayor” got Swift-boated.

About four dozen protesters, mostly relatives of World Trade Center victims and firefighters who typically form Giuliani’s amen corner, showed up outside the Bay Ridge Manor on 76th Street near Fifth Avenue to pick apart the central piece of the former mayor’s legacy: his handling of the 9-11 terror attack.

“The mayor has blood on his hands,” said Rosaline Tallon, whose brother, Matthew Tallon, died at Ground Zero. “He wants to walk into that reception as the hero of 9-11, but we want to remind the public of who this man really is.”

Tallon and others said the mayor was responsible for the faulty radios used by firefighters that day. And they also said his leadership was anything but inspiring in the aftermath.

“My brother died because of the antiquated equipment this man bought — and people need to know the truth,” Tallon said.

The Giuliani campaign expected to take heat from the right on social issues, but now finds itself in the unexpected position of facing questions over the one piece of his resume that appears golden to the rest of the country.

The protest at Bay Ridge Manor, and others nationwide, brought back memories of the 2004 presidential campaign of John Kerry, which was torpedoed when some of Kerry’s former Navy comrades formed a group called Swift Boat Veterans for Truth and started attacking the decorated war hero’s patriotism.

While some of the charges against Kerry were inaccurate, the “swift-boating” of his campaign resulted in one of his perceived strengths — his military service in Vietnam — being turned into a liability.

Now it’s Giuliani’s turn.

“We are trying to peel him back like an onion, layer by layer,” said Uniformed Fire Officers President Peter Gorman. The union official then addressed Giuliani, who had already been spirited inside the Republican-friendly catering hall, directly: “We will be here today on your home turf, in any borough, in any state.”

The media may have gotten the message, but the former mayor certainly didn’t.

That’s because as the number of protestors swelled to over 40, they were quickly corralled by police, along with the media, behind metal street barriers on the other side of the street.

“This is a frozen zone,” said Captain Eric Rodriguez, the commanding officer of the 68th Precinct. “Everyone is going to have to be behind the barriers we set up across the street.”

The order contradicted a Giuliani aide, who only minutes earlier, had told the media that the former mayor would meet with the press “to answer a few questions,” before hitting his fundraiser/63rd birthday party. But the mayor and his staff had an apparent change of heart after seeing the swelling protestors.

“There is nothing I can do,” said the aide. “You are just going to have to listen to what the police say.”

Instead, Giuliani’s black SUV pulled up directly in front of Bay Ridge Manor’s entrance at 76th Street between Fourth and Fifth avenues — out of view of media and protestors. The mayor was quickly escorted inside, as the protestors greeted his arrival with chants of “shame on you.”

For civil rights attorney Norman Siegel, who helped organize the event, the metal barriers brought back memories.

“No access and metal bars — it reminds me of his days as mayor,” said Siegel. “Just imagine, if he gets elected, these metal bars will be on a national level.”

Inside, though, Giuliani was hailed.

“Long before he was ‘America’s Mayor,’ Rudy Giuliani turned around a city everyone said was ungovernable,” state Senate Majority Leader Joseph Bruno (R–Rensellaer) said in a statement. “He did it with the same principles he displayed on September 11 and on the days and weeks that followed — moral clarity, strong leadership and accountability.”

Of course, the protestors weren’t buying it.

Jim Riches, who lost his son, also named Jim, on 9-11, believes it would be a “nightmare” to see Rudy become president, and that while the mayor can run, he can’t hide.

“He acts like some big tough guy when he talks about terrorism, but the truth is my son was fighting for his life while he hid under a table,” Riches said, then addressed Giuliani, who was, alas, out of earshot.

“You are a coward, and you can run, but we are going to follow you — wherever you go.”

These mailmen are armed for dog

By Matthew Lysiak
The Brooklyn Paper

This is National Dog Bite Prevention Week, the seven days of the year when the United States Postal Service tries to educate Americans on how to keep their dogs on a shorter leash.

But our local mailmen aren’t waiting to see results. After years of looking like a letter-toting piece of meat to area canines, mail carriers have finally fought back.

They’re now armed with pepper spray.

The arms race began last year, when a mail carrier in Bay Ridge became a living cliché after getting bit in the rear pouch by a German Shepherd.

“He went to drop-off the mail and the dog just took a bite out of him,” said a postal source. “He had to go directly to the emergency room.”

The mailman has chosen to remain anonymous (we’ll call him Junk Mail), and like most things in the United States Postal Service, many details must remain shrouded in secrecy. But we do know the route: a dangerous stretch on 88th Street between Colonial and Ridge avenues.

Junk Mail’s description of the beast conjured up images of Cujo.

“It was a big dog — the kind of dog that is a dangerous weapon,” said Junk Mail. “This kind of dog is on the attack when it sees people.”

It certainly wasn’t the first time a dog took a bite out of a local mail carrier. Nationwide, there have been more than 3,000 reported case of dog-bites-mailman, according to government stats.

In an effort to go into the belly of the beast, Yellow Hooker embedded himself with one Bay Ridge postal worker as he navigated the dangerous mail receptacles (often within fenced-in yards where dogs roam). As in so many combat pursuits, the key to survival was an awareness of your environment, explained Postal worker Tyrone Johnson.

“A lot of times your vision is impaired by obstructions such as fences or even doors,” said Johnson. “If you can’t see the dog coming, you need to listen.”

Johnson, who has been delivering mail for more than two years, says that people wouldn’t believe the risks letter carriers face, especially when putting the mail through the door slots while anxious dogs lay in wait. He asks for owners to throw him a bone.

“The owners need to get these dogs under control before something serious happens,” said Johnson. “At least three mailmen have been seriously bit within the last two years around here.”

Johnson says he carries Mace, but luckily, has never had to use it.

“I have been nipped a few times, but nothing real serious, yet.”

Man’s best friend is rarely to blame, according to Richard Gentles, the director of administrative services at the Brooklyn Animal Care Center.

“Just use common sense,” said Gentles. “Most people don’t know how to approach a dog, and then they get bit.”

A spokeswoman for People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals agreed that owners need to act more responsibly, but says that the spray is downright inhuman.

“Using Mace or pepper spray is extremely dangerous and cruel,” said Beth Daphne. “They shouldn’t ever use it when there are more humane ways to keep them safe.”

Daphne says that she saw someone get pepper-sprayed once and it wasn’t pretty, and believes that instead of weapons, mail carriers should be better trained to deal with their historic arch-enemies.

“I think postal employees should be trained to better understand a dog’s body language,” Daphne said. “Most dogs aren’t looking to bite people; they are just defending their territory.”

She also would like to sweeten the pot a little bit with a small bribe.

“Spraying dogs could just make them angrier,” Daphne said. “I would advise the carriers drop the Mace, and instead arm themselves with dog treats.”

Johnson rejected that Neville Chamberlain-style appeasement.

“Some carriers give snacks, but I don’t think it is right,” Johnson said. “If the dog is used to getting treats and God forbid you run out, you are in big trouble.”

The Kitchen Sink
What a surprise! The Brooklyn Young Republicans have endorsed Rudy Giuliani for president. Next, they’ll come out in favor of tax cuts! …

Two ambitious school kids, Dylan Gottesman and Bash Naran, are making a series of Bay Ridge films soon to be available at www.beyonddreamsentertainment.webs.com. Anything has to be better than “Brooklyn Rules,” the new movie featuring Freddie Prinze Jr. (check out the scene where he clumsily folds his slice while sitting at L&B Spumoni Garden) as a Bay Ridge boy with a indefinable accent. …

The Taj Mahal, at 7315 Third Ave., knows how to treat its guests. Our source tells us that one of the waiters dealt with a crying baby by picking her up and rocking her back and forth while the parents enjoyed their Tandoori chicken. I hope they gave at least 20 percent! …

The Committee to Save Bay Ridge United Methodist Church is considering buying the centurion landmark at the corner of Fourth and Ovington avenues. Committee organizer Kathleen Walker said she wants preservation groups and other locals to band together. All it will take is just $12 million! …

The Stoop understands the need to work through the night on resurfacing Third Avenue, but couldn’t the jackhammering wait until morning? …

Congratulations to Tara Cernacek, who won The Stoop’s “Hero of the Week” award for her tireless work placing abandoned animals with new owners. Her store, Happy Pets, which is at 9818 Fourth Ave., has placed more than 100 shelter animals into loving homes.

Not so great wall divides; Feuding neighbor story makes The Paper

By Matthew Lysiak
The Brooklyn Paper

Tear down that wall, Mr. Cunningham — or is it Mr. Moore?

That was the refrain from a chorus of residents who came to last Monday’s Community Board 10 meeting to support a man who claims he is being terrorized by his mysterious next-door neighbor.

The unneighborly spat goes back more than five years, but this cold war recently went nuclear after Robert and Cheryl Cunningham began building a 60-foot-high cinderblock wall at their home at 123 87th St. The wall is only inches from their neighbors at 127 87th St., Matthew and Jean Gershon.

Needless to say, the wall didn’t go over well with the Gershons.

“It is blocking our windows and we can’t get light or air,” said Matthew Gershon. “We are asking for someone to help us stop him.”

More than 40 people showed their support at the meeting, at which Gershon spoke at length about the situation on his block.

“In May 2006, workers removed wooden plants from our yard and broke our kitchen window,” he said. “The Cunninghams have aggressive dogs, which defecate on our property, and are rude at every chance they get.”

The Department of Buildings’ Web site lists 44 complaints against the Cunninghams’ property. One 2002 violation for working without a permit remains open.

A spokeswoman for the department said that the wall appears to be legal, given the existing zoning. But the spokeswoman, Kate Lindquist, added that “in light of the community’s concerns, we will audit the permit application again.”

That wasn’t enough for Gershon. “This guy has all of these violations, and we are being brushed off,” he said. “When is enough, enough?”

Enough may already be enough, according to the man who lives at 123 87th St., who told The Stoop that his name was not Cunningham, but “John Moore.” He invited this reporter into the house and talked about the situation, saying that he was the one being terrorized by an “insane” neighbor.

Department of Finance records show that “Moore’s” property is indeed owned by the Cunninghams. There is no mention of a John Moore in city records.

Still, “Moore” said he doesn’t understand why everyone is upset with him, and that the wall is simply the beginning of a house being built on a lot he claims not to own. City records, though, show that there is no lot between his and the Gershons’.

“I don’t know why people think I am the owner of this property,” the man said, while giving orders to the men building the structure on the property. “I am just the victim of one man’s craziness.”

Moore pointed to video cameras and high-powered spotlights that he says Gershon had directed at his property.

“That crazy man shines those lights at my bedroom window so we can’t sleep,” Moore said. “He also likes to videotape what is going on inside of my house.”

But if the CB10 meeting was any indication, residents along the quiet tree-lined block between Ridge and Colonial avenues shared one unanimous opinion: that the man living at 123 87th St. was bad news — regardless of what he called himself.

“He has been known to use aliases,” said neighbor Angelo Biondo who lives three houses down. “Everybody knows this man compromises the integrity of our neighborhood.”

Another neighbor, Charles Miller, said he expected the large turnout at the board meeting, “because our neighborhood has seen enough.”

Still, there must be a chance for a diplomatic resolution to this stand-off? No, not really.

“I have had enough of this crap,” Moore said. “I am looking to move away soon.”

Moore didn’t say where he would go, but it would certainly come as a relief to Gershon, so long as Moore makes sure to take his wall with him.

“I’ll believe it when I see it,” Gershon said.